Ever Get the Feeling That You're Trapped?

I know this may come as a shock to some, but my marriage is far from perfect ;) Yes it's true we fight, and, yes its true, we often fight about the same thing over and over again. And that thing we fight about over and over again is usually communication and the lack thereof. I can't even tell you how many fights have been about this: "I need you to talk to me. I need you to let me know where you are going so I can make a plan."

And yet still the problem arises.

Our most recent one happened just this week, and I was hysterical. There I was about to sit down to dinner with my husband, I thought, and I turn around and he's gone. After waiting only a few minutes I just started to eat alone. Well then the babies start crying. I'm trying to keep things under control, but, lets face it, we spend all day with our children and when our husbands come home we're hoping for a little relief. At least I am. I'm always thinking, "Finally someone to talk to, to help me feed them, and maybe now I won't have to change every poopy diaper."

Well I start to lose it. I feel so unbelievably trapped. I'm stuck here with two babies crying and I'm in no condition to go back and comfort them. I have no idea when I can be relieved, and I have no idea where my husband is. All the while I'm thinking in my head, "We've talked about this so many times, and yet here I am at the beginnings of yet another argument."

And that is when I started feeling a little hurt.

Now in Craig's defense we manage apartments, and he isn't just taking off to go goof around with friends down the way. He is actually doing work, but I just still would like to know where he is going and why.

In the end we resolved everything, and I called my friend the next day and we talked a little. And something wonderful happened. I felt refreshed and happy again.

She told me to set aside one night a week to just go out, baby free and have some "me" time. I'm sitting here thinking, "Of course, why didn't I think of that? I mean here I am just talking to another woman, and I already feel so much better and so much happier."

I then remembered back to when I was pregnant and it was absolutely necessary that I hang out with women at least once a week, or else I would loose my mind.

I don't know why we, as mothers, don't just take that "me" time. I guess we just figure we should love being a mother all the time, so we just stick it out in hopes that we can learn to totally and completely love it.

Well I decided to established a "girls night out" with my mom and sister-in-law. If anyone wants to join us you are more then welcome. I think this will help me love being a mom even more.