Sunday, July 12, 2015

If You Get 4 boys Ready For Church

If you get four boys ready for church you will get responses like, "We're going to church? I don't want to go to church!" Trying to respond to these is usually unwise,  so you'll hand them their clothes and dress the two that aren't arguing with you.

If you hand them their clothes and tell them to get dressed you'll come back 5 minutes later to find them still in their underwear. . .

If you hand them their clothes and tell them to get dressed you'll come back 5 minutes later to find them still in their underwear. . .

If you hand them their clothes and tell them to get dressed you'll come back 5 minutes later to find them still in their underwear. . .

You turn off the TV.

If you turn off the TV you'll get some sass, but they'll agree to get dressed. You ignore the sass because the two you got dressed just turned on the hose to fill up their water guns.

If you find them playing with water guns you may decided to just shrug it off. It's hot, they'll dry off quickly and you need to get dressed yourself.

If you decide to get dressed yourself you'll most like get interupted after you plug your curlers in and take your pajamas off.

If you get interupted you'll spend the next 45 minutes running around the house in your underwear telling everyone to stop fighting and to not bring food into the bedrooms. And You'll run upstairs 10 times before you finally remember to grab their socks and shoes. You'll also almost walk outside like 10 times.

If you deal with all the messes and fights, and you've patted yourself on the back for finally remembering the shoes, you will probably believe you can now get ready for church.

If you believe you can now get ready for church you will walk into your childs room to find a package of graham crackers on the floor with crumbs everywhere.

If you find this package you will yell at your children in a voice you didn't know you had because you spent 10 hours cleaning the house the day before, while the kids went with their Dad.

If you yell at the kids they'll probably cry.

If they cry you'll feel bad and apologize, but you will ask the guilty party to vacuum up his mess.

If you are at this point you will then decided to turn on a show, however annoying, and tell the kids to just sit there and watch it so you can get dressed. You'll finally put on deodorant and a shirt and you'll finish putting curlers in your hair.

If you finally get to put curlers in your hair, you will help the kids put on their shoes and finish getting ready.

If you finish getting ready you will go outside, snap a picture of the only kid that will let you and you will start walking to church. 

If you start walking to church you will hear protests like, "Can't we just drive? I hate walking! I'm staying here!"

If you hear these protests you will offer to get the stroller.

If you offer to get the stroller you will notice your new shoes just broke, for the second time, in a different spot.

If your shoes break you will most likely change them.

After changing your shoes you will be on your way to church.

If you are on your way to church your kids will still argue. Some will stop to look for the water in the storm drains and ask you a million times where it is. Others will yell at the ones stopping.

If you hear these arguments and deal with these pauses you'll do your best to shrug it off because you got out the door and that's SUCCESS!!!

Even if you are 2 hours late

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